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Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Doubting (and) Thomas

I am on one of my periodical visits to the internet and I have enough time to squeeze in a blog to reassure any readers of my continued existence. As part of the recent events in my life I find myself, happily, as the primary carer for 8 year old Thomas. He is not in school at the moment because the education authority won't have funding for a teacher's aide until next term and so Thomas and I are enjoying life, studying at home and becoming even better friends. There is no doubt about my love for my other two boys but, because Thomas and I have more time together and because of his disabilities I feel a strong bond with him.

In the midst of the changing times and reorientation there is also my continuing journey of faith and doubt. I went back to church 2 weeks ago but, I have to be honest, and say that evangelical church with its songs, 30 minute sermon, coffee and return to the world leaves me very cold. I know such a bland, limited sentence leaves me open to criticism but for about a year now I have been trying to find a way of honoring my sincere spirituality and love for God with my disillusionment with institutional church.

This is a story that will be continued.

2 comments:

Tim said...

hey Les,
so sad to read of past events with you. Hang in there mate, I understand your frustration with church - I even feel it sometimes but not as bad as you I'm sure. Will be praying for you mate.

God Bless.

Tim

demetrios1 said...

St. Ignatius wrote "Nothing visible is eternal." That goes for "institutional churches" as well. By definition they are flawed, as they are maintained by man. But they are sustained by God, who we should be the focus of our faith. Sometimes it is difficult to focus on hat one cannot see, even when "it" is everywhere. Keep the Faith, Thomas!