Wednesday, July 16, 2008
Who told me that when you're a Christian marriage and relationships are supposed to be easy? Well, actually, no-one told me that but you get the impression if you set foot in a church that life is rosy back at the homestead. Most churches I have attended on a Sunday seem to be populated by copies of "The Waltons" (yes, I am showing my age - contact me if the TV illustration has gone over your head).
I have been married for over 12 years and we have gone through a fair few trials. On top of everything else our middle son has an autistic disorder and can prove to be very challenging.
We came through some difficulties in recent times with the false allegations that were made about me which resulted in us leaving our local church and my stepping down from active ministry. Recently we have been feeling that God is calling us to lead a church plant. Lo and behold we are attacked again. The temptation to stick my head in the sand, pull back from ministry and hope that it all goes away is very strong.
Right now we are struggling. For lots of reasons I am not the best husband in the world. I share this, not out of a false sense of humility, but out of honesty in order for you to pray. I believe in a real devil and in the real presence of enemy forces that seek to disrupt and pull down Christian ministries and Christian families. As I have thought through postmodern ideas I toyed with the idea that evil was a concept but looking back on prayer ministry I have done in the past and the countless "coincidences" where I seek to serve God and troubles come has made me aware of the reality of evil.
It is at this time that I need to fall back on the rock of my life which is Jesus Christ. Too often I have fallen back on habit, addiction, arguments and counseling. Some of these are not wrong but they are also not solid foundations. If I am to build a strong marriage, family and Christian ministry then all that I do must start and finish with Jesus.
I hope this makes sense. I keep planning to write something erudite but I always end up being vulnerable. Please pray. My wife is a great woman and I am very blessed. There are two sides to every story but I am prepared to accept that my part is pretty poor right now and I need wisdom and strength to move forward successfully.